Ego

"I keep the white-belt mentality that I can learn from anyone, anywhere, anytime."

-Georges St-Pierre

 

"In the process of trial and error our failed attempts are meant to destroy arrogance and provoke humility."

-Jin Kwoon

 

-The art of teaching is tolerance. Humbleness is the art of learning."

-J.K.S Iyengar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ego, a person's self-esteem or importance, is something all martial artists possess. In its own right it can be debated as being good or bad, but to me ego is synonymous with one word; self.

I see nothing innately wrong with the self, but I do see something wrong with it when our ego's do fall into one's self-esteem and importance.

You see, you can be the founder of a martial art. You can be a master, or grandmaster. A teacher, but ultimately you mean nothing.

I know, I know- that's harsh, especially coming from someone like me who is accused more often than not of being arrogant.

But that's the funny thing about what happens when you, innately, have no meaning or affixation to your self. It is then you can determine and make the meaning tied to your being.

In the end we are no better, or no worse objectively than anyone else. You may be taller, you may be faster, you may have more physical strength. Perhaps you can think faster, perhaps you are a genius. What does any of that matter?

I have won and lost tournaments. I have placed third, second and first across multiple arts. I have won a tournament because I was literally the only person who showed up to compete in fighting. I refused the winnings because of that. I once placed third because there were only three of us who showed up to fight.

I have practiced 21 years, and am going on my 22nd. I have trained at more schools than I care to count, been a head instructor at five, an instructor at nine, and an assistant instructor at all of them. I have helped found a martial arts club that brought me joy and pride in the time it existed because it represented the ideals I emphasize in martial arts; charity and open-mindedness.

When I was 13 and a 3rd dan I decided to start over. And there is a subtle humility in that; to have a black belt and status of rank and be willing to go elsewhere and don the white belt again so you can re-earn or earn another dan.

No matter how great you are, or where you are in life, there may always come a point you have to restart. You can be the greatest fighter or warrior in the world- but if you cannot step off that pedestal and stand among the ranks of beginners, and feel their equal, then all that ability and power means nothing.

Martial artists, if they are true martial artists, do not care how good you are. We don't really compete against each other, we compete against ourselves to become better. And if your belt is destroyed and you feel a sense of loss of identity because of that, you are not practicing the right way. We are not defined by our belt, a black belt does not make us a black belt. I have met people who were black belts in character who have never stepped foot in a dojo.

Humility is not in bowing, it is in the reason why you bow with sincerity.

No matter where you are in your martial sojourn you should be confident in yourself for the steps you have walked, but not proud. Many have walked as you have, and many more will walk and go farther than you ever will, even if one day you are the very best.

That is the nature of the world; someone, eventually, will always go farther than you. And perhaps you may be the inspiration that causes that. That is why true teachers teach; not only do they get to improve themselves, they get to create what comes next, what will surpass them. And the ability, and willingness, to make another better than ourself even that is what we want for ourselves is true humility.

That is why if you have a teacher worth respecting when you bow they will back.

Believe me when I say this as someone called more often than not arrogant. Arrogance is undeserved confidence. But confidence which is truly deserved is not arrogance in the least. It is simple truth and recognition of one's own character and ability.

When I speak about being able to fight multiple people at 5'4" most people believe I am being arrogant. It is not arrogance about the fact of whether I can, it is arrogant I would speak of it at all.

Arrogance is recognition in any form we seek for ourselves. This is why true masters do not call themselves such, others do first.

Do not sell yourself short, however. Speak only of yourself and what you can do when it is meant to help others achieve the same. A worthy character is not one who speaks of climbing the highest mountain, but rather show how you can climb it.

For me, shedding my ego is perhaps one of the hardest things for me to do. I want what the Buddhists have, freedom from the self, while still being able to hold onto it. This probably isn't possible, and I recognize that. It is my heartfelt desire to spread martial arts. If I could find some way to change martial arts, that all would give it freely, we could do away with belts, that we could find a way for it to help those who are injured or sick, that is my goal.

Once upon a time I wanted to become a martial artist because I wanted to be a power ranger. I was three when I made that decision. What I had to learn in the two decades and more since is what I truly wanted was to help others through martial arts.

Now to figure out how to do that without the 'I' as put in the paragraph preceding this.

Perhaps I should have titled this post 'humility' but there is no way to speak on that topic without speaking about the ego also.

 

Both Are Masters.

 

 

 

"The humble man makes room for progress, the proud man believes he is already there."

-Ed Parker

 

"Humility forms the basis of honor, just as the low ground forms the foundation for a high elevation."

-Bruce Lee

 

"Happy is the man who breaks the chains that hurt his mind, and has given up worrying once and for all."

-Ovid

 

"Some people like to call me cocky or arrogant, but I just think 'How dare you assume I should think less of myself.'"

-Ronda Rousey